I am a bit of a (and by “a bit of a,” I mean “a pretty serious”) magpie, and have amassed a fair-sized collection of bright-and-shinies over the years. For a long time, I’ve kept them in a secondhand jewelry armoire I liberated from a friend’s Goodwill pile, but it stood on the floor and reached only up to my waist, and this, I have noticed lately, was becoming a problem. I found myself hanging the necklaces I took off on the switch of the lamp NEXT to the jewelry armoire, because I didn’t want to deal with the disorganization inside the armoire, but also because I didn’t want to bend over and futz with it, because every time I bend over, my lumbar spine hates me just a little more, and we weren’t on very good terms to begin with. I try to save the bending over for important things like $50 bills on the sidewalk and babies tied to railroad tracks. Throwing my back out over a necklace is just a stupid waste, orthopedically speaking.
In a fit of cleaning and organizing, I decided I was going to get rid of the jewelry armoire, and get something that worked better for my advancing decrepitude. In the meantime, I needed to put the necklaces somewhere, so I hung up some of those Command Strip hooks, like this:
I knew when I did it that it would be temporary, and I already had a plan to make something prettier, but the stink-eye my roomie gave me when he came home told me that he’d immediately assumed I’d lost my mind and was bent on nothing less than the total destruction of the aesthetic of our bedroom (which he had absolutely nothing to do with in the first place), starting and ending with the sin of visible jewelry.
I don’t know why; the earrings had been up there for months (I made the rack out of a piece of retired mesh storage cubes we had, like these, after finding nothing I wanted to buy), but evidently the necklaces were a bridge too far. I scoured the internet for a better storage solution, but everything was ugly, undersized, or ridiculously expensive, and most were all three. I checked Etsy, and found a few cute things, but they were still expensive. However they did give me an idea of what I would do.
I got some Greek key molding from Home Depot, some glass knobs from eBay, and a can of gold spray paint, and with the application of a little elbow grease, a mitre box, and a drill press, I made my own.
And then I mounted them with Liquid Nails inside my bathroom cabinet, so certain people to whom I’m married would not be offended by naked jewelry in plain sight in the bedroom. I had enough to make one for bracelets, too, and still have leftover molding, knobs, and paint if I decide I need more down the line.
Oh, and I moved my earrings into the closet, too, so the only jewelry now visible in the room is whatever I happen to be wearing. Certain spousal units of mine should be thrilled. Or they should fake it well, if they know what’s good for them.