Posted in Commentary

English, how I love thee and thy strange ways

Why does no one ever have the lower hand in a situation?

Neither are you long-handed (or tall-handed, for that matter) when your place of work has too many slacker employees.

It’s a problem if you’re left high and dry, but why is no one ever left low and wet?

Why is no one ever asked to broadcast information on the up-high?

Nobody is ever cold under the collar; neither are they ever in cold water which, by most reckonings, would be less pleasant than being in hot.

There are no forehanded compliments.

No one gives someone the warm shoulder.

Why don’t we have an afthead?

Don’t you think people who are bad at home improvement projects should be called “footy”?



I've been doing some form of creative writing since 9th grade, and have been a blogger since 2003. Like most bloggers, I've quit blogging multiple times. But the words always come back, asking to be written down, and they pester me if I don't. So here we are. Thanks for reading.

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